REMEMBER WOODY FROM TOY STORY - PULL HIS STRING AND HE SAID, "THERE'S A SNAKE IN MY BOOT!" NOW I KNOW HOW HE FEELS!

Yes, OMG!  Uber, major, heebie jeebie, creep out morning: went to put on my shoes to go do chores, when I  felt something squishy in my left shoe. Thinking "How the heck did someone get a pile of poop in my shoe - or - did I step on a big pile last night when it was dark out and i had to fill the water tank for the horse?"  So I pick up my shoe and look into the toe area, but I can't really see anything so i lean the shoe over the sink and tap on the bottom.  Kerplunk! Out falls a SNAKE! A SNAKE! IN MY SHOE!!

  I did the icky oooey dance for about 10 minutes, did a little oooooooo (shaking violently), I had thoughts of calling Madison back home from school to remove the snake from the sink with no concerna aboutr her schooling, the teacher would understand, " Sorry i am late teacher I had to save my mother from a man eating, fire breathing 8" gardner snake."

No i couldn't do that but what? All I was thinking now was get that damn thing outta my sink!  I didn't know what to do. He was just lying there, i know scared to death, he was pooping everywhere.    All i knew is I wanted him gone and i was the only one home that could do it.  Do i nail a board across the sink and wait til Maddie comes home to remove him?  Can't do that - she won't be back for another 5 hours and what if he escapes?  Then i have him wandering around the house and I don't know where he is, he could show up in another shoe or perhaps my bed!    EEEEEEewwwww!  (Shiver)

So i suck it up and grab a towel, thinking I could just wrap him up in it and throw him out the front door.  But then i realised that I can't do that, he'll just shimmy right out the towel, I'll drop him on the floor, he'll take off and I'll be screaming bloody murder while watching him writher around my kitchen getting all freaked out at the woman screaming at him when all the little guy really wants is to get the frick outta my house!  We were in this together now.

So my next thought process is a plastic bag.   I can properly hold him by the throat while using the plastic bag and not have any way to physically come in contact with his body. As i reached into the sink for him I noticed he looked a little bedraggled and worn and i realized he probably was bought in by one of the cats last night or this morning so he wasn't moving very fast. I picked him and tossed him out over the front porch into the flower bed and watched as he just laid there for awhile, probably quite disturbed and disorientated. 

This is no way to wake up in the morning And now, an hour and half later I can still feel the chills up my entire body thinking of how that felt in my shoe, wondering if i had left him alone if he would have entangled himself in my toes....(big shiver still happening). This may take a few days to get over.

And NO!  I didn't get any pictures!